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June 10, 2006
Chuck Pearson in soccer-content shock!
Back at my old web-place of residence (I would link a specific blogpost, but alas, Blog MatchNight has gone the way of the dodo) I used to offer links to the splendid soccer writing of Dan Loney all the time. He's one of the few writers who makes me laugh out loud at least once every time I read him. Of course, the things I laugh at, nobody else does. Oh well.
Anyway, I spin this tale just to let you know that Dan Loney of American Soccer News is the only pundit on the planet to predict that the United States gets farther than the second round of the World Cup.
And even if you don't get this, I think it's bleedin' hilarious:
United States over Brazil. Yeah, you heard me. Revenge for 1994. Brazil is ready to fade. Eddie Lewis is a better right back than Roberto Carlos. We've heard of defense. Rickety old Brazilian defenders are no match for Brian McBride. Somewhere in Miami, Romario looks at Kasey Keller leading his legions of German fans and says, "I told you so." Belo Horizonte is forgotten. Nike permits this because they forget to order the United States to lose.
(I especially like the bit about Brian McBride. However, I would.)
Loney has the Yanks also getting through the quarterfinal stage, "solidifying America's position as the most hated nation on the planet. In fact, I hope we win on a bad call. That would be just awe-inspiring." He projects a semifinal exit to Argentina. "What are you, crazy? We're not as good as Argentina. Get real."
And if you believe any of those predictions, I have an MLS franchise to sell you.
Posted by Chuck at June 10, 2006 10:41 AM
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