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March 10, 2005
Sucky week.
Hence, the dearth of entries.
And here's the thing: Given that the vast majority of people who post on this thing are students of mine in some form or another, I'm very limited on what I can tell you about why it's been sucky. In fact, some things I can't tell you at all.
Which just makes things even more sucky.
(And now you see why I was never an English major.)
I will say this: I have a group of students, and those of you who read ramblings like this are among them, that must be the most loyal in the world. The degree to which you let me in your lives and ask me to help you through the rough stuff just astounds me, every day. I have the greatest job in the world.
And I honestly wish there was a way, while you are a student of mine, that I could fairly reciprocate and let you totally into my world.
It can't happen. Because there are some students who don't deal well with this whole shared-lives thing. They don't have any interest in me, and they don't think I should have any interest in them. They just want the knowledge, or the grade (or maybe both), and they want to move on with their lives.
And the moment I give a certain set of students a certain amount of "secret knowledge" that nobody else has, then I have just favored one over another. And I can't do that. Period.
I have had other faculty (especially at the other place) tell me point-blank that the way I handle students is totally off the wall. You are supposed to be there for office hours, and then you shut the door when you're not on them. You leave the students on campus, to learn on their own, the way they'll have to do eventually. Get your camraderie and your fellowship from people your own age, in the community. Isolate yourself from your students. That's the only way you can be truly fair.
And they have a point.
But if they miss the joy that is to be found in this vocation, what good is having the vocation in the first place?
I make no claims on having this teaching business figured out. I hope I get there eventually. But hopefully, I can continue to be fair in the meantime.
(And hopefully, nobody is too upset if the exams don't get done.)
Posted by Chuck at March 10, 2005 11:00 PM
Comments
ehh....its ok...i still love you!!
YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
Posted by: Sarahj at March 10, 2005 11:48 PM
i'm glad that some of my professors (whether i've actually had them or not) take the time to get to know me. it's part of the reason i came to a small school. don't let other people tell you how to do your job as long as you aren't breaking any rules.
Posted by: Celestia at March 10, 2005 11:53 PM
Agreed with Celestia. I came to this small school because of the feeling of camaradarie. I love that you are available and open and sharing and warm.
I'm sorry your week's been sucky, and I'm even sorrier that we, the loyal, cannot share that burden.
Posted by: Rachel at March 11, 2005 12:03 AM
I'm also sorry you had a sucky week. While small schools are nice for the relationships you can build, they're also not nice for the rumors that can spread when you don't act like everyone else. So while you might not be breaking any rules by opening up to students, you certainly don't want stuff said about that could hurt your career. And on a different note, since I'm not currently a student of yours or even at the school you teach at then I can't be a favorite right? So if you feel so inclined you can let me know whats going on if not I'm sure you have a pretty decent support network built up there in Rome. Hope next week is better. And I'm glad you're blogging again. Keep it up :)
Posted by: Nancy at March 11, 2005 10:52 AM
Okay. Here is my take on teacher-student friendships. Being the daughter of a teacher, and the friend of teachers, having helped teachers paint their houses and deal with the death of their son, I can tell you that yes, there is a line. And yes, Nancy has a point in that you don't want rumors spreading about... well, whatever people want to think. Just realize that the students with whom you feel inclined to share any troubles you may have are probably bright enough (and caring enough) to not say anything about it to other students, or around you when other people are around. That being said, I understand your hesitation, and the confusion associated with 'teacher-student' friendships. But. Having been accused of "having an affair" with a teacher myself, just because he's a family friend, I can understand the reluctance for that. But from what I can gather, you, like he, are well respected at this school, and such comments are not only unfounded and ludicrous, but just plain funny to think about.
I lost what I was going to say next... happens with us Englishers, we get so caught up in our words mentally that our hands just can't keep up!! 'swhy, according to my elem teachers, my handwriting is so pitiful, cause my hands can't keep up with what my brain's telling them. ANYWAY. 'nuff bout that.
Suffice it to say that it's your judgement call, duh no shit sherlock. But. You have people, students or not, who not only care enough to want to help, but understand enough to care without knowing what's wrong. Just remember that.
And again, sorry about the suckiness, general or otherwise.
oh yeah---
HAPPY SPRING BREAK. chill out man. go swing with your daughters at a park. eat ice cream til you explode. work a few math problems in base four *wink* and remember that those of us who care are going to be thinking about and praying for you no matter what. so :P
Posted by: Catie at March 11, 2005 05:21 PM